There was a time when the biggest parenting problems I could imagine involved nose picking, a fascination with weenies and whether I could con my kid into eating veggies.
I was in good company. Preschool parents like to worry. And they like to take action. Right now there’s a petition circulating about backpacks. The two juntas (or possibly three because when you get two parents together, you get at least three opinions) believe that we have to do something about the backpacks or our babies will have humps by high school. Rolling backpacks have their own sets of serious implications and no backpacks might affect self esteem of the children who are already bonded with their bags.
I just got off the phone with a friend who’s very concerned that all the snacks provided at school are not certified organic – this is a matter for the PTO.
Another pal is concerned her color choice was wrong for her daughter’s sneakers. Which could lead to ostracizing and being off the best birthday party lists. This is worthy of a call to a behavioral therapist.
Is that you? Am I laughing at you? Yeah maybe a little. Don’t worry though. In ten years you’ll be laughing at you too. I’m just jealous. Jealous of your Pre School problems the way I am jealous of the people who have first world problems such as “I’m gutted. I can’t get my favorite imported cheese for my birthday party” and “Whatever will I do?!The Lexus I want isn’t available with piped leather seats.”
I’m not talking about real issues – dealing with a learning disability or a health or social problem is tough at any age. Sleep training an infant is brutal and new moms deserve props. But there is a golden era from 4 to 10 or so and you’d be wise to enjoy it. But maybe you can’t. Some parents need to bitch and moan and make a fuss, even when perhaps they have it good. They just don’t know it yet.
I do.
Now that my oldest kids are in middle school and high school the problems they face seem so much more real. So much scarier. When your kids are older, you don’t find parents arguing with one another about how organic packed snacks need to be. You won’t hear them agonizing over whether their kids are happy with their backpacks and shoes. And if they could trade peer pressure to use drugs for a nose picking habit? They’d be three fingers in.
I’m worried about my babies driving cars. Dating boys. I’m worried about the choices my babies will make and the company they will keep. Sure I think they are awesome. But their world isn’t preschool any more. It’s a mine field out there.
It a lot easier to sweat the small stuff. But I’m not gonna. I have older kids. I have real problems!
Brava! Big Kid problems are also so much harder for parents to talk about for some reason. They tend to be much more individualistic, not lending themselves to blog posts or magazine articles where everyone can chime in with, “me toos.” It’s tough out there!
Thanks for this. As kids grow the problems become more of psychological than physical challenges. Mine is still in pre-school but I’m focusing on teaching her the emotional coping skills she’ll need to traverse the difficult world of adolescence and beyond.